Values !

There I was Midnight, on the bridge thinking about how far I have come, wondering  how far I have to go. Standing there wondering with the wind brushing through my hair, the sky pitch black like my mind. Shuffling through the music in my phone that gave me company in my solitude. I found her- my teacher, my mentor, my role model. The one who inspired me, the one who encouraged me to dream bigger, the one who made me who I am now. The one who was instrumental  in my growth and made sure that I always took the right path.  Tears rolled down my eyes as I had no clue what is happening with her or how she was doing. The job had left me with very little time to find her or was it me who did not give a fraction of my time to find her. At that moment in my chain of thoughts, It occurred again how far have I come and how far I  should go. All I am now was possible only because of her. As I browsed through my gallery I found pictures which were lost in madness and craziness, notes which were hidden in my race for glory and fame and contacts which were filed with unknown names. At that point I understood, I have failed to understand where I have come from and who made me what I am. At the stroke of midnight, standing there with a mobile in my hand and tears rolling down my eyes, I fought my conscious making right of all the wrongs I have done. I blamed each and every thing for turning me into something I am not but in fact it was just me. I chose to be this. In my race for this glory,fame and money. I never realised I lost all my values, my  ethics and my principles and in short I lost me. Everything she taught me, every bit of human being that she wanted me to be. Every bit of love that she infused in me… all gone. When I look back all I could think of are the stress, frustrations, deadlines, reports, shouting, and the backstabbing’s. I chose this over the values instilled in me. My guilt destroyed me. I became something that I never was, I lost my smile, my friends,my love,my passion, people who made me who I am , I lost everything and for what - to prove to everyone that I am someone I am not. My thoughts went back to my roots - the place I started, the person who made me believe that I am stronger than my problems and the one who told me to never change for the sake of change. Maybe I did not find time to call her cause I did not want her to know who I have become or what I have become. I decided at that moment, I should not let her belief in me - die in vain. With my hands trembling greater than the old rickety bridge I am on and with a mind pitch dark as the sky and the courage that came to me like a guardian angel from nowhere. I dialled the ten digits – the ten digits that kept me from reaching to her all this while. I could not understand which was louder my heartbeat or the telephone ring. The phone was ringing……

PS: Could not think about any other title :P